4TH OF JULY RESOLUTIONS
Got a little easy @ 11:07 a.m.
on 2003-07-08
My 4th weekend was fun, busy, and exhausting. I actually got to spend some good quality time with the fam, which is a shock, considering they're all high-strung moralists and I'm sooooo the black sheep. I also got to see some old friends. I also met some new friends. Two guys and me ended up playing strip poker till six in the morning. They were drunk and I was dealing, so around 5am, they were down to their skivvies (actually one had boxers, the other briefs) while I only had to take off my socks and shoes. Momma was on a roll, and as the music was changed to a Tejano station, they ended up clumsily salsa-ing with each other, the larger man in briefs was from Nicaragua and kinda knew what he was doing, the other redneck was just being slung around I think. I was thinking that my newly-out friend should've stayed awake for this, it was his house, after all.
Knowing how we were all raised pretty much the same, it's strange how we've all grown up so individually....one friend's now married and a home-body, the other has a 3 yr old and fake tits, and yet another has recently come out of the closet. Hmmm, I wonder what label they put on me. For my birthday last year I received a self-help book for cynics. I found this rather odd, as I have never thought of myself as a cynic, but apparently, everyone else does. I always envisioned myself as just having a witty sense of humor. Somewhere along the line those wits grew a bit sour. I know I've gone through some trying times with family and boyfriends and trying to 'find myself' whatever that means, but where down the road did I lose my kindness? Can I be a kind cynic? Where's the line between realist and cynic? Oh fuck me, this is all getting too damn philosophical, and I already flunked that course years ago. Crap, was that a cynical thing to say? Hahaha
So right here and now I'm making a 4th of July Resolution: I will strive to be a less cynical and more optimistic person.
And to play more strip-poker.
:)