A STRANGE CONVERSATION
Got a little easy @ 1:59 p.m.
on 2003-09-08
I'm all bejiggety right now, as I've just sent in my resume to the company that I would *LOVE* to get hired by.
Also, Joe and I had a weird talk last night.
I've been talking more about our future together lately. Usually I'll joke about how we're gonna need a Partridge family style bus to cart around our 20 kids (him being Mexican AND Catholic it's expected), but I've taken a more serious tone the past few weeks, and he's freaking out.
His explanation was that he thinks I'm planning more for the future (3-5 years) than I am spending time finding employment right now.
Whaaaaa?
I tried to explain that while he's at work, I'm on this computer dealing with resumes, cover letters, unemployment, the workforce commission, etc. and when I'm with him, I just don't want to talk about it. And my not wanting to talk about it has prompted his Spanish Inquisition-style interviews when he gets off work.
"Did you talk to so-and-so?" "Have you finished your revisions?" "Did you send off file xyz?"
Fuck off, Yo! I can take care of myself!
I really hate that feeling that someone's looking over your shoulder because they know that any minute you're going to slip up. And that's how it feels when he asks me about my jobsearch. I know he's doing what he thinks is best for me, and to quell his own fears of me slipping into a destitute stat, but it annoys the hell out of me. And I told him this last night.
Also, I'm turning 25 next month. While talking with the bride-to-be on our trip to Vegas, she brought up very real clock-ticking issues, and that she doesn't want to be a veggie in the corner when the grandkids come to visit.
I've told Joe for a while now that I want to have a kid before I'm 30. 28 or 29 would be great, even sooner if we win the lotto. I'm going to need a year to plan the wedding, and want to be married for a while before I become a human-pez-dispenser. I repeat, I'm turning 25 next month....do the math.
I think it's perfectly logical for me to be discussing (out loud now) that he needs to get his shit together pronto cause time waits for no man.
And he's freaking out about a job.
Job's come and go, I want my marriage and family to last much longer than any job.
We ended up not ever coming to any eye-to-eye understanding.
Men.
So we snuggled and drifted off to sleep, knowing that things will all work out, eventually.